Tip #1 - Smell the flower, blow the candle
You probably know that breathing deeply calms and relaxes you.
The problem is, our breathing goes crazy when negative thoughts and emotions get the best of us.
So to prevent breathing like Norman Bates from Psycho, do the “Smell the flower, blow the candle” visualization.
1. Visualize a large flower in front of your face.
2. Inhale deeply, imagine you're smelling the flower.
3. Visualize a candle in front of your face.
4. Exhale deeply, attempting to blow out the candle.
Of course, you can picture anything you want, as long as it soothes you.
You can imagine smelling a fresh-from-the-grill, 12 oz Ribeye, instead of a flower, haha. It will work just as well.
Tip #2 - Sky High
Kick stress where it hurts by focusing on individual sensations.
Stress caused by fear, doubt, and frustration can hit us out of nowhere.
Dwelling on those negative emotions, like we often tend to do, turns them into 300 pound roided out behemoths threatening to smash us.
But even juice heads got them sensitive parts.
So shift your focus to individual sensations.
It’s like kicking that behemoth square in the nuts; the threat gets dropped (whimpering for mercy) and you happily go on your way.
1. Stand up from your desk, tall but relaxed.
2. Extend your arms straight up, sky high. Extend fully then return to a relaxed position. Notice how the muscles in your upper back feel as you reach upward.
3. Clench your toes tight then release. Notice the build and release of pressure in the muscles of your feet as you clench and unclench.
4. Clench your fists tight then release. Notice the build and release of pressure in the muscles of your hands as you clench and unclench.
5. Slowly roll your head in wide circles. Notice how your neck muscles feel as they stretch.
6. Repeat as desired.
Tip #3 - The taking touch
At work, your incompetent co-workers make you want to throw them out the window.
And your boss keeps asking about those “TPS” reports, haha.
Commuting home you daydream about ramming the idiot in front of you who’s driving 47mph in the fast lane.
Now you’re home and wish you could relax.
But your mind is overloaded with worries about paying the rent, buying your kids school supplies, saving for a house, getting work done on the car, your parent’s health, and the list goes on.
You feel your blood pressure shooting upwards…
1. Take hold of your wife’s hand
2. Lightly brush the back of your hand just above the back of her hand. Notice the faint sensation of the tiny hairs.
3. Place your palm just above her palm. Notice the warmth of her hand.
4. Draw your index finger across her palm and around to the back of her hand. Notice how the contours of her muscles feel against your finger.
Possible sticking points
The tips are simple and instantly effective, but you still might have some sticking points.
I know what it’s like to be so stressed you feel you might go insane. And I know how alone it can feel; everyone else seems so “together”.
I wish I could be there with you to answer your questions in person. Unfortunately, that’s not possible.
BUT I still want to help you as best I can.
So here’s some sticking points you might face and how to overcome them.
Sticking point: You try to visualize and focus but your mind wanders.
> Solution: It’s ok. Everyone’s mind wanders like this. So don’t get pissed at yourself. Just gently bring your focus back to the visualization or sensation.
Know that your mind WILL wander. That’s perfectly fine.
It’s not about how long you stay focused. It’s about how quickly you bring your focus back.
Sticking point: You’re unable to focus on just one sensation.
> Solution: Don’t worry, this is normal.
We’re so used to going about our day that we rarely pay attention to only one sensation in our body.
Just keep at it. In your mind, picture that area in your body.
Imaging you’re looking at it with a magnifying glass.
This will help to center your focus.
If it still seems hard, it’s ok.
Just keep at it and eventually individual sensations will become clear.
Sticking point: Negative thoughts and emotions are so strong they hinder your efforts.
> Solution: Don’t try to stop the emotions through force of will. Doing that puts your focus directly on them, which actually makes them stronger.
Instead, let the emotions run through you.
Imagine yourself as an observer, watching yourself.
Observe the emotion wash through you. Observe how you feel. Again, don’t try to stop it.
Just let it happen and watch yourself.
Focusing on yourself as a whole, rather than on the emotion, removes the stress and you take back control.
The big picture
There you go.
3 simple tips that will strip away stress in less than 30 seconds.
You also have solutions to sticking points you may face.
Use the tips and solutions and you’ll have less and less stress every day.
You’ll still have responsibilities such as work, bills, and things like the daily commute.
But imagine waking up each morning feeling refreshed and calm.
Imagine driving to work and singing along (out of key probably, haha) to your favorite song on the radio, rather than stressing about the freeway backup.
Imagine living without sudden heart palpitations.
Imagine the panic and fear…gone, replaced by peace and happiness.
Imagine your boss still being a dickhead, haha, but imagine feeling tranquil and clear throughout the day.
Imagine coming home to your wife and kids with a real smile; the kind that touches your eyes.
Imagine getting your business up and running. Imagine moving forward with a clear direction.
Imagine years later, the delight on your child’s face as you take him/her to the park, take them to school, and attend their college graduation…
Imagine getting the chance to age gracefully and hear your wife say “I love you” every day, for years to come.
I want you to have that.
Use the 3 tips I gave you and you WILL have it.
You’ll finally break free from the cycle of torment and fear you’re currently stuck in.
Use the tips and you’ll live a long, happy, loving life with your family; at peace and stress-free.